yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
thus making me awesome and them whores
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
