so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
