He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize