OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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