lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
