Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet