my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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