wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize
