please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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