I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
