This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
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She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
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He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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