Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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