sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
