There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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