the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize