Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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