you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
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