return my video game
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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