When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
