After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
