Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize