So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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