He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize