chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
