the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
