i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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