all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
