dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
