no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
