i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
