Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
