Jerry, you need to find god
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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