Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
