if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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