I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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