it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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