Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
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