seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
