i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I got her a Nickelback box set.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize
