so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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