i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I think people are normalizing furries
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
