What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Randomize