so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Randomize
