Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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