PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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