it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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