I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
