if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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