I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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