and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Nobody cheats on THIS.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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